The Tao of Neighbors - aka: How to avoid a toilet-papered house

As some of you may know already, I have some of the best neighbors in the world.  And a couple of the absolute worst.  And since I know such a situation is quite commonplace among the suburbs, cities, hamlets, dales, etc - I thought I would share my "guide" for being a good neighbor.

1.  My property is my property, and yours is yours.  I don't barbeque in your front yard for my pleasure, don't send your screaming children to play in mine for yours.

2.  If you don't like my life, stop paying so much attention to it.

3.  I don't tell you how to decorate your house, sit quietly and keep your thoughts on my covering up a caca brown color to yourself.

4.  I know you think your children are abolute angels, so why don't you actually spend time with them?

5.  Just because you believe in free childcare, doesn't mean I have to provide it.

6.  It's good to have flights of fancy, but not good to have them at someone else's expense and then spread the stories around.

7.  Just because my yard is a corner lot at the end of the street, doesn't mean that it's the neighborhood park.

8.  Creating a homeowner's association that no one is obligated to adhere to or join, means that you have absolutely no authority to try and impose your will upon others.

9.  When I want your opinion, I will ask for it.

10.  Continuously lingering on someone else's property without permission, when you have been asked to leave, is called trespassing.